Friday, December 19, 2008

On This Our Eleventh Year

I will never forget the look you gave me when you saw me that day. The day that I became your wife. I don't know if it was surprise, shock or nerves but your gaze transformed me. It made me comfortable in that white poofy dress and with all the fussiness of the day. If I didn't know it that day, now I know it was what I wanted to happen at that moment right before we covenanted to be each others forever. At that moment time became eternal, your eyes transformed me into that regal woman. That woman who knew that her helpmate cherished her, loved her, saw her as she was, and saw her as his . I feel my words are lacking at describing what is in my heart. Yet, eleven years later that instance mesmerizes me. It strengthens me. It calms me.

I was thinking how there is so much that has happened between that time and now: school, children, more school, moves, wrinkles, receding hair lines, and all other necessities of life. Yet, the emotion that your eyes held at that moment has never left me. I dare say that there are times when it has represented itself. Maybe when our children were born and our joy expanded. Maybe it was just a look you give me when my hair's messy and I am not at all fancy but your eyes permeate mine. There are times over that last eleven years where that light, that eternal pause comes unexpectedly. I love discovering those glances. I stash them in my pockets with all the clever things our children say and all the family snuggles in the bed. They linger with all our car ride talks and ten second kisses. Those looks let me know that you forgive me for nagging you about cleaning up your socks and letting my frustration bubble over. We are not perfect but that look assures me that some day we will be.

To 11, 22, 33, 44, 55, 66, and on to eternity.

Love Always.

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